I was in my parents house for a month this time. Its pretty rare for me to stay that long. I usually visit for a week or so and mostly team it up with a Delhi visit, which somehow, just did not happen this time.

I was forced to realise that my parents, without exception, bring out the worst in me. I don't know how this happens... I dont really plan it that way, I try (not hard enough for sure!) to keep my mouth shut when things get pretty bad... but nothing really helps!

Its like life is this smooth sail... still, peaceful river... I do the things I like, be the way I want to be...try and be the person I'd like myself to be, atleast most of the times.... and then - suddenly the topography changes - the land is rougher, there are stones, pointed, harsh, there are rapids, waterfalls... wild animals... everything changes! This is time spent at my parents house!

There is a concept of human revolution, about changing from the inside in Buddhism. Only when this change comes about, can real change happen in the world around us. Whatever human revolution I actually accomplish when I am in Bombay, slides back to zero in Gwalior! Why...? Well, that is a mystery. Could it be that my parents really have'nt changed in all this time? Could it be that I actually am like that only - the way I am in Gwalior, and in simpler circumstances just become better. Which life is more real? Which self is more real? I am very confused this time. I almost feel like I have travelled back through time, when I sat on that Bombay-bound train!

Someday, I hope to take my life that I live here, the person that I am here, back to that primal place... the house of my parents! That day, true human revolution would have happened!!